So, I feel like I haven’t wrote a blog post in ages. To be honest, I haven’t had the time or motivation, also, my inspiration lately has been lacking. I’ve been sat here for a while now, staring at a blank screen not knowing what to write. I’ve had a lot going on in my life lately, and I’m still trying to figure everything out.
I recently graduated after completing my MA in Education and decided to go on and train to become a teacher. I’m just about to start my PGCE. A part of me thinks I’m not mentally ready for this, with everything that is going on. But, the other part of me is excited to start this incredible adventure. I’ve always wanted to teach. I want to be that teacher that always puts a smile on their students, I want to be that teacher that motivates its students to not just be willing to try but, always have the will to try. I want to be that teacher that allows students to not only be comfortable in themselves but also love themselves. I hope this PGCE year and teaching is exactly how I have always imagined it.
I’ve also had to reduce my hours at work as I’m starting my PGCE, I couldn’t bring myself to leave my job, I absolutely love it. I became too attached, so I decided to reduce my hours and work around my schedule. I can’t believe some of my pre-schoolers have just left to start school. It’s been too emotional. Working with children has taught me a lot, they have helped me learn so much about myself. I am forever grateful to them. I think one of the biggest things working with children has taught me is that ‘positivity is key’. Every situation has the potential to be a positive one. I was a role model for the children that I was in charge of, a parent told me that her daughter “thinks the world of me”, and I was in tears. I realised that if I was looking at everything with a positive outlook, my children would also do the same. I can only hope that I have made a difference in the lives of the children that I have worked with, just as they have irrevocably changed mine.
In case any of you don’t know, I’m writing my very first children’s book. I’m so excited about it all, it means a lot of me. It’s personal and I can’t wait to see this amazing piece of work progress further. But lately, I’ve been stuck in writer’s block and can’t seem to get myself out. I’ve sat in many different coffee shops drinking endless amount of coffee and staring at a blank screen. I’ve been feeling like I’m out of words. Am I really in writer’s block or am I just unmotivated. You see, I’m a little stressed out too, I have way too much on my plate and I just don’t want to deal with it. I’m choosing to ignore it and hoping everything will sort itself out.
Coffee… I have been drinking way too much coffee and working next to Costa Coffee and Starbucks is not helping me or my bank account. I’ve explored a lot of coffee shops recently, coffee dates have got to be the best dates. I’m always up for a coffee and a chat. There is something beautiful about sitting in coffee shops and writing, I love the environment, I feel comfortable. I like to people watch, I observe every little detail. I have the same order in every coffee that I visit. I’m a regular, the baristas know me. It’s home. I could sit there for hours.
Finally, I am slowly learning this world is wildly unfair. At this point in my life, I don’t think I have felt more lost and confused than ever before. But, I’m trying my best to handle it with a coffee in my hand.