The world lied to you. Your twenties are the hardest years of your life.

 

I’ve just been to see my therapist. Yes, I have one of those. And I’m not afraid to admit that I go to therapy. We live in a society where people think if you see a therapist you are ‘crazy’. Well, I think we are all crazy and weird and it’s the people who don’t accept this, are the ones who need to see a therapist more than any of us.

Your twenties are probably the hardest years of your life. They are the most confusing. I think what makes it really depressing, is that you think they should be the happiest years of your life. It’s because the world makes you believe that your twenties are the years in your life in which you are the most young, wild, and free. I admit that I’m lost. In my twenties, I completely lost myself.  I feel like there is a lot of pressure on those who are in their twenties. A lot of that is from social media and society. In your twenties you need to have your career sorted, you need to be engaged, married, have a car, your own home and be financially stable. I’ve achieved none of those things. Well, I have car, which I struggle to pay monthly insurance for because I’m a trainee teacher. 

I am no where near figuring my life out. Expectations will be the death of me. There are expectations by the society, by your peers, by your friends, and by your family. You are expected to do a lot of things in your twenties, from finding the career that you want to spend the rest of your life doing, to getting married and being financially stable. You are also expected to explore new things, let yourself loose and enjoy being young. But, you also need to be a responsible ‘adult’. Honestly, right now it feels like I’m just yolo-ing my way through life. I have people telling me that “You have plenty of time to figure your life out” then there are others telling me that “You only live once” and that “life is short”. 

Is it normal to lose friends in your twenties?. Are we expected to know everything?. Am I doing everything wrong?. I’m 24 and I feel like I have achieved nothing in my life. Is that normal?. Is that okay?. A part of me just wants to sleep for the rest of my life, the other part of me is determined to figure everything out. But, I feel like I’m taking longer to ‘figure myself out’ than others. (Takes a deep breath with tears in eyes). 

Mariam x

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